She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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