Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
