So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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