You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
