i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
