yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
