plz talk dirty to me
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize
