how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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