they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
