i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
