fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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