I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
