please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
