Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize