I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
