im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
