wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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