Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
