hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
its not stalking. its research.
She announced her abortion via fbk
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
