is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
