Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
