***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I looked at my own cervix.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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