its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
