If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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