I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
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