I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
