That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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