Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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