I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
