Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
North Korea, Best Korea!
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
