I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
