okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
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