She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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