I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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