These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
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