he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
