Everything about him screamed your future.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
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