I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize
