I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Randomize
