God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize