you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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