8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
