at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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