I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
