I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
how drunk are you?
Several
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
