He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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