when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
