Cold hands, warm shart.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
