i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
