**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
