D3 body, D1 cock
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I have post one night stand depression
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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