Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize